Rock Accountant

Month: November, 2014

Liberal Art

A liberal arts education is intended only to achieve a basic comprehension of advertisements.

White Lawyers

Diversity is an illusion manufactured by colleges, corporations, and the media to protect themselves from white lawyers.

Musk Puppets


My mother was painfully beautiful. It was impossible for me to view her otherwise. She knew full well that I loved her. I was fortunate to be her son, or I would have been in trouble. It was dangerous to love my mother.
The signature constancy of my childhood was my mother bringing men into my orbit, so I could observe her hurting them. She used their faces like mirrors, seeing their desires instead of her image. She dealt harshly with men who dared to believe they could have her. Loving her the way I did and needing to possess her myself, I enjoyed her pastime immensely. I wanted her suitors to suffer, and she obliged me by dropping these men’s hearts into me, like worms into a hungry baby bird’s jealous beak.

Her vengeance should have stopped abruptly when she died, but even at her funeral, the men lined up to get the closer look of her, at her wonderful lifeless body.
I sat alone in a pew, unsure of what to do about my jealousy and my rising rage, watching them leer at her in the coffin with undisguised pleasure. The room was dark and thick in velvet cadaver scents; the organ disciplined the crowd and the tone of solemnity. Unknown people condensed themselves behind me. Mother had family. Father’s were too embarrassed to come.


It is not enough to say all is lost
When my love is that which God will toss
Just out of my reach for all my days
Laying grief upon me in so many ways
It was wrong to invent a world where one must fathom
Hearts being dropped like leaves to a chasm
For when I arch my back and scream, “No take me”
My God, just stands there as a tree

Unsure Rainbows

One eyeblink,
shakes a tear into the open bazaar
of embarrassed rainbows.
An unsure man
drifting backward down the quiet slope
of abandoned pride.
The last ledge of the steps he is tumbling down
and this woman
deciding it all.
Be careful of falling down those stairs.
At the bottom,
you will find you are not a man,
just another unsure rainbow
in love.images

You Are Only Here Because of Me

The miscalculation the Democrats are making with granting amnesty to these new people coming into the U.S. is that they will remain forever loyal to them. They use as their model black voters who have done so nearly seamlessly.
It is wholly unlikely that these people will enjoy being rolled out every election cycle as evidence of the “goodness” of any political party. They will want to just quietly get on with their lives without the fanfare of politicians and the media constantly taking credit for their being here.

New Wives and the Return to Bodice Ripping

My wife and I have more than adequately substituted the relationships we once had with our now college entrenched children with a revivifying blend of Netflix, Amazon Prime, and a splash of HBO and Showtime.
We are revisiting our initial dating patterns from now long ago without any of the thoughtful incorporation of each other’s feelings. If viewed from a distance and with a cold eye, our marriage is more contingent on how rapidly a new season of our favorite programs come available than by our swiftly receding enthusiasm for our children.
As a fatalist, I constantly fret that Hollywood will not be able to keep pace with us. My ever optimistic wife concerns herself only with “which” and never “if” new shows will come along, We thus resemble early man in highly flattering ways.
We casually adopt the accents and dispositions of the characters in each series, particularly those that have multiyear installments. By the time we had finished “Game of Thrones,” I had bought a long handled, two-headed ax and had our dog scared shitless that I was coming for him. I had also knitted a flattering hair shirt. My wife had chained our cat in the basement for fire breathing. She, for the briefest of times, was convinced the beast was wandering the neighborhood setting fire to goats from above.
Mind you, not all of this is frivolous. The twenty-three-year run of “Breaking Bad” provided three extensions to our house from the windfalls from my sale of bright blue methamphetamine to my now jittery neighbors.
This month we are watching “The Tudors”, so I am guessing it won’t be long before I take on a couple of new wives and spend my days ripping bodices.

Great hurt makes us want to be alone.

We are the only animal that is aware it is living. Other species’ are sailing around and around chasing the next meal, avoiding avoidable pain or cheekily trying to have sex.
We are also uniquely cognizant of being alone. Similar to our remedies for meals, pain and sex, isolation forges a passion for philosophies, religions and Sunday night Bingo.
It is difficult for our kind to enjoy the isolation. We like and loathe companionship but despair at having no one at all. The hushed men, returning from war are many times relieved to not engage in fellowship.
Great hurt seems to make us want to be alone.

Taunting the Unknowable

Ok, let’s just admit it; global warming is fun. We love to scare ourselves. The period between birth and death can get pretty dull so every human culture tricks itself into believing things to spice shit up. Heaven, hell, and Sasquatch are all part of the illusory and irrational frat party we invent to taunt the unknowable.

IPhone Isolation

There should be an immunity for old people who leave their phones on in movie theaters regardless of the disturbance. I politely switched the ringer on the side of my IPhone to “off” seven months ago. It never occurred to me I had to put it back on. It was badly isolating.


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